Friday, August 14, 2015

What Your Momma Never Told You: My Favorite Tips for the Worn Out, Burn Out and Just Plain Fruity Momma (Back to School Blog Hop)

This is it! The last day of the Back to School Blog Hop! I hope you've enjoyed yourself and found an idea or resource that you can take back to your life. Today I have more advice (ready or not!)

We all get worn out. Frankly, some of us wear it like a badge of honor." I am worn out and frazzled and scattered, but my kids need so much…"

I am not going to get into what our kids need (or don’t need). This life if not an easy one. There are many challenges. I frequently have to remind myself that it won’t do any good to write a post entitled “You people don’t know what I go through. So don’t judge me.” Or “My pet peeves about the human race.”

Whining doesn’t get us anywhere.

Neither does the competing we seem to do with each other. After hearing about your friend’s bad day, do you find yourself trying to “one-up” her? “You think that’s bad…”

Just stop it.

Please. (I'm using my nice tone)

I don’t have all of the answers. But I do have a few little things I do that help me along the way. My ideas won’t solve world hunger or encourage honesty among politicians.

There just might be something among my ramblings that you can think about adding to your life.
Some of them might seem kind of silly. Just remember those silly little things are what make up the moments of our lives. Let’s be kind to them.

Some of my advice is fairly blunt. I apologize if I offend. It is only my intention to encourage. Sometimes encouragement can only happen by recognizing the things in our lives that needs attention. At least, that is how I see things. I am not speaking about anything I haven’t personally experienced.

So maybe your Momma gave you similar advice.

Good for her.

First off. You are doing a wonderful job with the whole momma business. Give yourself grace. There will be seasons of your life that are just hard. I wore the same thing 4 days in a row last month. Josiah has eaten a peanut butter sandwich (which he has made himself) almost every day this summer for lunch. You are God's beautiful creation; made in his image.

I put just a pinch of cinnamon in my hot tea or coffee every day. The cinnamon has wonderful therapeutic properties; not to mention it is an excellent natural help for blood sugar issues. Plus, it smells yummy.

I have a friend who loves to put hot chocolate mix in her coffee. Yum. I don’t drink coffee every day, but when I do I like it to be special.

I don’t have a dishwasher. The water has made my hands feel horrible….all cracked and dry. I started using gloves to help with that, but also found an extra benefit by slathering lotion liberally all over my hands before putting the gloves on. I know am giving my hands some extra TLC. I don’t even use fancy lotion or fancy gloves. No use it overthinking it.

Momma’s need a Time Out. If you are feeling ragged and rundown, chances are you are ragged and rundown. It’s time to declare a truce with your schedule. It’s hard for me to feel like I have let anybody down. But I’ve learned that now and again I have to say, “I’m sorry, but I really can’t.” Give yourself a day or a week. You’ll thank me. I do accept chocolate.

Are you aware of this scripture found in I Thessalonians?

1 Thessalonians 4:11-12 (NIV)

…and to make it your ambition to lead a quiet life: You should mind your own business and work with your hands, just as we told you, so that your daily life may win the respect of outsiders and so that you will not be dependent on anybody.

I don’t do drama. It wears me out. Some of us need to learn a quiet life. If you are causing drama…Stop it. Take a nap and a time out. Let God speak to your heart. He’s got this.

I journal several times a week. Even if its to just write a scripture out in my best handwriting. I like using sparkly gel pens. Sparkly makes me happy.

We live in a culture of the “gimmes.” Some of us (especially in the homeschool world) are existing on one income.  I personally have had to force myself not to complete an “eye roll” whenever somebody talks about not having something new and shiny. New and shiny won’t make you happy. However, times do get hard. Whenever our pockets are empty and there is a need, I simply make myself write out all of my blessings. They are without number.

After a long and tiring day, we like to watch old movies.  I like something with singing. Lots of singing. I will pop some popcorn and hot chocolate. What is it with me and chocolate?

Do you have a hobby? My friends. You need some sort of hobby. Even if is simply reading or putting puzzles together. I like have something that can my occupy my hands during quiet moments or while watching television. I like to doodle or loom knit. I have read that those folks with busy lives need hobbies even more. Hobbies help de-stress and stimulate the brain.

Once a week I try and set up a little spa in my bathroom. I generally use a little bit of baking soda in my tub. It helps detox my body from all of the impurities that I expose it to. Baking soda also relieves discomfort from yeast infections and soothes irritated skins. You can also use Epsom salts and an essential oil. I have a corner of my tub that I keep a scrub, pumice stone, an orange stick, nail clippers and nail polish remover. I scrub my feet and take care of my toes. I will also put a deep conditioner on my hair during my tub time. Often I will light a few candles and bring in a recording of soft classical music. I want to encourage mommas with tiny kids to hang in there. Eventually you will be able to bath in private. Eventually. If you aren’t a fan of classical music put on something that soothes you. However, I recommend Debussey’s Prelude to an Afternoon With a Faun.

A benefit of growing older is becoming comfortable with yourself. I think it’s because you can look back and see God’s faithfulness at every turn. You know yourself. You know your quirks and faults. If you are wise you recognize that you don’t have to be everything to everybody. You just need to be what God has called you to be.

That leaves me to my next little thought. There is great comfort in giving control of your life to God. Perhaps there is a situation that seems impossible. When you have done all you can do…Stand. Let God hold it for you.

If you are married treat your husband like you adore him. Let your smile be one of the first thing he sees when he comes home. When you constantly belittle his choices and air your grievances (especially those about him) the Bible says you are like a leaky faucet. I realize there might be issues with him as well. Let God take care of your husband. You are responsible for you.

Do your best to make your home a place of peace. It should be a shelter for your family. This doesn’t mean that we won’t have bad spots or times. Pray. 

Sometimes we just have to Regroup. If something isn’t working take a long and hard look at it. Are you using a particular curriculum because your friends are telling you it is the best thing on the planet (including me)? If it's not working for your family don't use it. You might need to slow down. You might need to get your act together.  Just change direction. 

Move. Not to another house. Move. Your Body.

Stay hydrated. I have a big mason jar that I fill with ice water every day. I might refill it a couple of times. Some days I add lemon. Other days I put a few strawberries in my water. Most of the time I don’t make it complicated. I don’t have time.

Do you get distracted? Are you spending too much time on the computer? Or with a task? Time yourself. I have several little projects going on at once. I am doing some freelance work and trying to get a little business going with my Mom.  It is in my nature to do something to completion. However, I have had to learn to time myself. Say for example, I need to work on our little business for a while. I will give myself an hour. For projects that I am dreading (like finishing the dishes), I will time myself. I will put 15 minutes on the timer and do all I can in the kitchen for 15 minutes. You will be surprised what you can get done in 15 minutes.

Rituals aren’t just about human sacrifice. (too many Indiana Jones viewings?) There is something lovely about doing one special thing every day. My special thing usually involves a cup of tea and my sparkly pens. What is the one thing you can do every day that will help you focus? It might be journaling.  Or reading a portion of Psalms. 

Be gracious. There is no need to be hateful to the people that you come in contact with. We experienced a little road rage incident this past week. The young man involved used every dirty word he could think of….nothing like being screamed at while driving. My husband handled it beautifully. He apologized and we promptly went another direction. Just be nice. We have all been guilty of feeling like we “just need to be ourselves.” Sometimes we need to do less of being ourselves and more of showing Jesus.

Smile more. Even if you don’t have much to smile about.

I could write some more, but then I would just start meddling. 

I hope you have a lovely weekend, my friends! 

 This post is part of the Back To School Blog Hop from my friends at  the Schoolhouse Review Crew and Homeschool Blogging Connection. Be sure to check my landing page out for their links...I know you will blessed! 

1 comment:

  1. This is truly a wonderful post. On the give yourself grace comment, boy do I need to hear that. Thank you mama.


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