It's much later than it needs to be. I have a whole list of things that need my attention, yet I find myself doing piddley things like writing nonsense blog posts.
Yesterday, I promised an update on those green velvet pillow covers I ordered from Amazon.
Overall, I like them. They are a tad bigger than I needed. I'm not quite sure what I was thinking about when I ordered them. I generally order 18X18 covers for my 20X20 pillow forms. These look a little baggy.
I already noticed a bit of cat hair clinging to this one.
Princess the Cat adores a good textured pillow or throw. Kind of like her momma.
I like fabrics that feel good on my skin and, like most of us, find fabrics that are scratchy and stiff unbearable.
My project for today is a simple one. I have a blank spot on my gallery wall. 99% of this wall is made up of my momma's artwork. My goal is to find a frame that I can stick a piece of jewelry in. It is a broach that belonged to my great-grandmother. I had it displayed once before, but I believed the frame didn't make it through out last move.
I realize my little project has nothing to do with preparing for fall. But I have been staring at that space long enough. It's time to act.
Do you find yourself behind in "projects?" I certainly love a good project. Even the most mundane of details fail to frighten me away from one. BUT I can get overwhelmed if I have too much going on.
So for today. Let us start where we are. I had good advice from a friend. This was concerning weight loss, but I think it applies to whatever we are doing. We need to do the small things first. Don't focus on the enormity of the task or project or goal at hand. Do what you can TODAY.
And today I can take myself to the thrift store to find a little frame.
So what is a small thing you can do TODAY to reach your goal?
I was drinking my morning coffee in the big comfy chair in the living room when I noticed them.
Not an actual picture from my living room window. This is a stock photo. I couldn't put THAT much effort into this post. 😁
Bits of brightly covered leaves peeking out of the trees across the street.
I immediately began to plan the first pot of chili for the season. I am one of those annoying people who can't be bothered to celebrate fall while still running the AC at full blast. Until I feel like I can sport my fuzzy socks and slippers without fear of heat stroke, I feel downright awkward pretending it's really fall.
Cause it's not.
Until it is.
I am trying a new approach to my fall decorating and celebrations this year. l hope to give a peek into what I am doing. In the meantime, I don't want to wish away my days for the hope of new things to come.
I think we have all been guilty of that. We are so anxious for 2020 to make a quiet exit that we are not fully enjoying the days we have.
Sure. They don't look like they used to. There is unrest and uncertainty. But let's be honest. There has always been unrest and uncertainty somewhere. We can chose to get swallowed up in the drama and chaos OR we can live our lives with purpose and gratitude.
Sometimes it's as hard as getting up in the morning and deciding to ask for God's direction and grace for the day.
I am spending the next few days leading up to the "official" start of fall preparing my space and my heart for a simpler and gracious season. Today, I am focused on decluttering some spaces. I also made time in my morning to write this post.
I've got some green velvet pillow covers coming in the mail from Amazon and a pumpkin spice candle sitting on my kitchen island ready to be burned.
I'll report back tomorrow and let you know if the velvet pillows are everything I hoped they be.
I hope that I have inspired you just a little bit.
Or at least given you some mindless reading material.
For my last week I want to talk to you about being comfortable in your own skin. This can be difficult for many women in particular.
I am 40something and still struggle with many aspects about "me".
As I write this I am multi-tasking. And when I say multi-tasking I mean the TV is on and I've got half an eye on what's on. There is a segment on about the new fashion trends for the new year.
One of those trends is wearing see-through netting. This, of course, reveals certain undergarments on the wearer.
I hope this doesn't become a "thing".
I have enough trouble seeing folks at Wal-mart in their jammies.
But there will be those among us who jump on the "netting wear". Just like there were those of us in the 7th grade who begged their parents for a pair of parachute pants. Preferably in purple.
More so than making questionable fashion choices, the challenge for many of us is being comfortable with who we are. Instead of embracing the beautiful creature God made us to be, we wind up at war with ourselves and spend most of our time trying to be somebody else.
If I could give any advice to my younger self it would be to focus on those qualities of inner beauty. And to recognize that there will come a time that all those trials and travails will bring about perseverance, kindness, loyalty...and more. They will add a depth of character that can't be mimicked by just knowing, doing or saying the "right thing" or the "popular thing".
Of course, there are always things we can work on as we grow. None of us will ever "arrive"...at least until we meet Jesus. But I think the recognition of that in itself is beauty. We are all flawed.
So my friends. On this last post of this series, I encourage you to see yourself the way God sees you.
I encourage you not to follow the trends and common practices of everyone around you. I encourage you to be really honest with yourself. Are you your biggest stumbling block to living a beautiful life? How can you improve the life your living? Are you enjoying the moment? Are you filling your life with lovely things?
As a Christian it is my ultimate goal to portray Christ. I also need to search my heart. Am I trying to please man? Galatians 1:10 tells us that we must seek the favor of God.
There also needs to be some defining about what is Beautiful in your own life. What are your values? Your hopes and dreams? What do you inspire to be?
This is Beauty to me.
For me it is having new adventures. Even if that adventure is to wander through a book.
It is to treat others with kindness and compassion. To consider others more than I think of myself.
It is to surround myself with things I think are pretty and inspiring.
Beauty is enjoying the moment...even if the moment is filled with sticky messes.
It is spending time with people you love.
And radiating the love of Christ. Especially when I don't feel like it.
It needs to be taking small pleasures in those little treats I give myself. A long hot bath or a cup of tea.
Beauty is taking time to appreciate breathing in and out. And walking. Walking is a good one.
Beauty is creating special touches with my hands. Whether it be a crooked crochet chain or a dish of tomato soup.
Beauty is my son's contagious smile and quirky sense of humor. It is my husband's fierce devotion and loyalty.
And Beauty is looking in the mirror and not turning away in disappointment. It is understanding that between those extra layers, lines and wrinkles that one who loves and is loved in return resides there.
I'm a bit late. I meant to be done with the series before the end of 2015, but it didn't happen. In fact, I have been trying to get this particular post up for a week!
Don't you love it when "life" interrupts your "life?"
For the past few months life has been happening around our clunker cars. Just a few weekends ago, we went through water on the road (we in Missouri experienced The FLOOD) and a car part blew off. The car (The Studly Muffin's Ford) got us down the road for a bit and then stopped.
In the freeing rain. And hail. 50 miles from home.
This weekend (our our way to church) we experienced electrical problems in the same car.
We didn't make it church.
Just this past month, my car (fondly known has Bessie the Buick) has had to have 2 new tires and a new windshield.
I don't have to tell you that we didn't have the money for any of it, but God provided and we are confident that He is going to keep on taking care of us.
Most of us have those day-to-day struggles that, if we are not careful, will suck the "life" right out of our "life."
We all know people who seem to float through life with just a little extra sparkle.
I'm frankly a bit phlegmatic (and a little snarky) for too much sparkle..but I sure appreciate those who seem to dazzle.
I have come to feel that we all need a little celebration in our day-to-day lives.
When I think of the word Celebrate I think about commemorating a special day or occasion.
If there is birthday cake involved...I'll be there.
The point is that I don't want to wait for those special days or occasions to celebrate my life.
I want to make every day a little special. I want to approach my life as "the occasion."
Of course, this translates itself in my life in ways that might be different from someone else's, but this week I want us all to think of little ways we can add a little "celebration" to our life.
This week I tried to do something everyday that was just a little special and sparkly.
Watched a ballet on youtube
Played a board game with Josiah
Soaked in peppermint oil and epsom salts
Made my family an extra scrumptious (but healthy) dessert and served it on china plates
Made 2 homemade cards
And tried to smile more than scowl...
Sounds simple enough. Right? I'm sure if you think about it you are already doing so many wonderful things to live a beautiful life. Just take the time to breathe them in and enjoy them!
My friends. I challenge all of us to Celebrate a little more!
I'm currently basking in my post holiday endeavors.
Basking might be an ambitious term.
I have spent a few weeks days trying to get my act together.
My act is apparently on vacation until further notice.
I've decided to embrace the crazy...I'm throwing tinsel on the whole mess and calling it a party.
It's tough to come to terms with our expectations. It's especially difficult for us mommas out there.
My sister and I were talking about this just the other day.
Mom Fail.
We were talking about all the candy and cookie making my mom did back in the day. Divinity, fudge, peanut brittle, toffee, sugar cookies, Mexican wedding cookies....
My mom was not a stay-at-home mom. She was a Respiratory Therapist. In fact, for several years she was head of her department. This meant she would work double and triple shifts if needed. She took college courses on the side and even taught art classes.
I am a stay-at-home mom and consider it a triumph if a green vegetable shows up at supper.
How did she do it all?
If I were to ask her, I'm sure she would say, "I just did it."
I can't tell you how many times I have felt like a complete FAILURE when it comes to parenting. It seems all the more vicious to be because we worked so hard and waited so long to become parents to this beautiful boy.
I have lost my temper too many times to count.
I don't feed him the right foods.
I feel like I am struggling to school him the best I can (homeschool mom guilt).
He is growing up in this uncertain and scary world and all I can do is fuss at him to pick up his room.
Maybe I'm not alone. I have a feeling I'm not. The point is that there is a lot expectations we put on ourselves. We feel inadequate compared to those other moms out there.
You know the ones. They have spotless homes. Their kiddos are adjusted, well-behaved and learned all of their multiplication tables before the 2nd grade. They never get impatient with their families. They always look put together and classy.
My house has it's moments. Most of the time, I'm just happy we can find the toilet paper. And today I spent the whole day running errands in my workout pants, one of The Muffin's old t-shirts and mismatched socks.
And don't get me started about my parenting and homeschooling mom skills.
Here is the thing.
There are some things that I want to improve on. Nothing wrong with that.
Then there are those things that I just need to let go. We all have those things. And the truth is that we are missing life because our expectations are simply unreasonable.
I know you have heard this one.
"Spending quality time with your kids is better than spending quantity time."
Of course, there is truth to that statement. However, our quality time spent with our family members doesn't have to be all about epic adventures and awesome stuff.
Our kids just want US.
This week your challenge is to let some of the Mom Guilt go. If there are things that need to be addressed make a plan to do just that. I don't want to give you the impression that I think it's okay to be a Mom Slacker. Sometimes we do need to step it up.
On the other hand, we need to simplify our lives. Focus on those little moments and times with our kids.
We have to let go those expectations that things have to bigger and better for our kids.
I have struggled more with what I haven't been able to provide for Josiah.
Siblings.
I realized maybe I was overthinking the whole thing when, just recently, Josiah provided me with a whole dissertation on why it was cool to be an only child. He doesn't want a house full of kids. He is perfectly happy with the way things are.
This week your assignment is to choose one activity to share with your child(ren). It doesn't have to be awe-inspiring...it just needs to be time shared together.
Let me know how it goes.
You can catch up with my Learning to Live a Beautiful Life Series here.
This week has found me in a tizzy. I am trying to find my Christmas season stride.
With little success.
Do you ever get tired of being "every woman"?
We are told that we need to be crafty, stylish, an excellent hostess, an ambitious employee, a marvelous cook...And notice I haven't mentioned anything about being a loving wife and mother.
I think many of those things are perfectly reasonable goals to have.
But Good Grief! ...Does it ever take a lot of work.
By the way. The Muffin and Josiah tell me that I say "Good Grief," a lot.
Moving on.
This week I am challenging you to chose ONE thing this Christmas season.
Well. Maybe not quite ONE thing in the literal sense.
But let's not make life more complicated than it already is.
Our goal is to LIVE a Beautiful Life. Simplify your life. Take care of yourself.
When life gets complicated, crazy and just a little busy, it soooo important to take a step back and make things easy for yourself.
Have you ever heard "a jack of all trades, but a master of none?" Let's slow down and concentrate on doing just a few things with excellence.
It might be easier than you think.
This is your challenge for this Christmas season. Make a list of every party, occasion and potluck you will attend in the next few weeks. Look through your tried and true recipes and pick ONE (or two) thing that will be easy to put together.
This is an example of some of my list.
The Muffin's Work Party: Monkey Bread
The Muffin's Work Dinner (they eat a lot): Corn Casserole, Salted Caramel Apple Cake
Church Christmas Potluck: Corn Casserole, Salted Caramel Apple Cake
Youth Small Group Christmas Party: Monkey Bread
You seeing a pattern here?
Your other challenge is to look through your closet and make sure you have a snazzy outfit to wear to all of those Christmas activities. For example, my ONE outfit will make the rounds to a special evening at a show in Branson (we were blessed by a sweet friend), our church Christmas service and anywhere else I want to put on the ritz.
If you tend to practice the "One thing" philosophy consider updating that outfit; especially if that outfit has been your go-to One Thing for a number of years. Don't get stuck. The purpose is to feel beautiful. If you are still wearing your party dress from 20 years ago....You might need to revisit the whole thing. My party dress from 20 years ago was a size 6 and had puffy sleeves.
This philosophy is not just to be practiced during the busy Christmas season. There will be other times of the years that tax your energy, your creativity and your patience.
For us homeschooling momma's it might mean that we need to back off. Maybe we need to just concentrate on good literature, steady math practice and copywork. It might mean that we need to do less outside the home and spend more of those minutes and hours together.
Applying the "One Thing" trick doesn't mean that your turning in your creativity card. It simply means that you are using your creative energies for dreaming, for sharing and for rest.
You might notice I'm a bit late. Which means you will be blessed with 2 Learning to Live a Beautiful Life posts.
Yay! Just consider it an early Christmas present. Aren't you excited?
I'm not suffering from a case of sarcasm AT ALL this week.
The truth is that I could do with a few days in the comfy corner of the couch. However, my house doesn't clean itself (ding dang it!) and my guys like to eat. So I am adjusting my expectations and trying to get a little done at a time.
We often find ourselves stressed to the max during this time of the year. Life doesn't slow down...it ramps up at warp speed.
I challenge you to take some time to slow down and purposefully plan those cozy nights at home that not only make memories, but keep the stress level down just a bit.
For the rest of my series I want to provide some very doable and practical challenges.
The challenge for this week is really simple.
You ready for this? You might already do it on a regular basis.
Here it is!
Light a candle every day (or at least every day you are home).
I love candles. I even include them in my housekeeping routine. After deep cleaning my living room my final act is to light a candle.
I think they provide a peaceful atmosphere. If you enjoy scented candles they help with a little aromatherapy. I personally like candles that smell like something is baking in the oven. Floral candles remind me of my spring allergies so I try and stay away from those.
My favorite candle of all time is the Home Sweet Home candle from Yankee Candle. Of course, it is frequently out of my budget so I have had to find other alternatives when I am candle shopping. Sometimes I have even purchased a few of my favorite smelling votive candles. I think where there is a will there is a way!
Currently, I have a wonderful smelling candle sitting on my bookshelf.
It is unlit.
The Muffin bought it for me and asked me not to light it until we put our Christmas tree up. He's a sentimental softy. Because it was a day that required a lit candle in the house, I brought out a few of my little votives and set them on my coffee table.
Here is the thing, my friends. Living a Beautiful Life means that we pay attention to those small moments in our life. We learn to love those little moments. Something like lighting a candle might seem insignificant in the whole scheme of things. We can't get trapped into thinking that life happens in big, sweeping gestures. If we make those small moments special the "whole scheme of things" become clearer. We find contentment in what we already have.
And sometimes lighting a candle just makes us feel cozy inside.
As I write this post, we have been in mourning with the citizens of France. Our nation's leaders are debating compassion, prudency and privilege. We are heading into an election year and the pundits and politicians seem to be suffering from the loss of civility and common sense.
I am heartsick with the thought of so many in the world suffering. There are peoples from all walks of life who deal with such life problems that we can't even begin to understand. Not only has terror struck so viciously in France, but in smaller and poorer nations. We haven't given those souls the same kind of attention.
I can't begin to understand it all or even form an opinion about what should or shouldn't be done. I am grateful to know that I serve a God who does not require such evil acts to prove my devotion.
He just asks for my heart.
This next week will be celebrating Thanksgiving. Americans all across our land will be feasting on roasted turkey and pumpkin pie. There will be many more who will rely on the kindness of others for a warm meal or a place to lay their head. There will be children who spend their holiday with not enough to eat.
This week I am not throwing you a call to action.
What you do make a difference in our world is up to you. It is a narrow and shallow existence to think that "your mission" is the only true and just one in the world. You have to do what you feel God has called you to do.
In the meantime, let's not get caught up in the cruelness and callousness of this world. Let's live in an attitude of Grace and Thanksgiving.
This week I want us all to mindful of the blessings we have been given.
This week I am to wrap The Muffin and Josiah in extra long hugs.
I am going to stare at crisp blue skies with appreciation and drink in autumn sunsets. If it chooses to rain, I am going to snuggle up with my loved ones and enjoy a hot cup of tea from the first sip to the last gulp.
I am going to make sure to smile at everyone I pass on the street. I am going to be a polite and considerate driver and remind myself that it's not always about me.
I am going to try not to take offense...even if I feel I am justified to feel offended.
I am going to slow down and maybe make a craft or three.
When I find myself frustrated with the cares of life, I am going to thank God for His provision and Grace.
Am I setting myself for disappointment and failure?
Possibly. It's hard to walk in an attitude of gratitude and grace. But it's sure the best way to travel.
Go, my friends. Make a list of your blessings. Take deep breaths in and out. Enjoy those autumn sunsets.
It is a Beautiful Life.
You can catch with my series by clicking the banner below.
I hope you are enjoying the glorious fall season and giving Thanks every step of the way. We have had really nice weather.
I want to talk to you today about stretching out beyond yourself.
I think we can become so absorbed with the comings and goings of our own lives that we forget about those who might need a blessing.
We also think that we have to be wealthy to give...which is such a big misconception.
The Art of Giving (I'm sure there is a book by that title somewhere) is not about doling out the cash...it is about giving what is in your hands.
If you have the cash to dole out, by all means find someone to bless.
But don't deny yourself the joy of a generous heart because you have to watch your pennies.
This week I challenge you to find someone (or someones) to bless.
First, think of a few people around you who might need extra encouragement.
I will tell you that there are a few friends in my life who have been absolute God sends. There have been times that they come through for me in ways that reached down into the worn out places in my spirit and brought me such hope!
I think there are those who have the gift of giving and encouragement. But all of us can do just a little something to brighten someone else's day.
Here are a list of no cost or inexpensive things you can do to be a blessing.
1. Send a card. We've gotten out of the habit. I love getting mail other than a bill. Don't you? Another idea is to write out a card of encouragement or "thank you" and hand deliver it.
2. Prepare a baked goodie. When I go to someone's house for the first time I usually like to bring a basket of muffins. They are easy to prepare and I can use the ingredients I have in my house.
3. Give something green. A bunch of wildflowers tied with a ribbon. How sweet is that? I personally don't have wildflowers blooming near my house, but I have taken an herb plant to a friend.
4. Do you know a shut-in or a young mother? Offer to do some housework or baby watching. I have been the recipient of both of these blessings.
5. Wrap a small candle in cellophane and make a tag..."You brighten my day."
6. Prepare a pot of soup for a sick friend.
7. Straightening up your pantry? Take some of your excess to a family in need. If you have the money buy the ingredients for a full meal.
8. Words of encouragement. We all know someone who could use a good word. Don't be stingy with your smile.
Here are a few words of advice.
Get your kids involved. They can make cards or draw pictures as a Thank You or to provide encouragement someone in need. One Christmas we had a sweet bunch of kids go through their toys to pick out a couple of extra special ones for Josiah. Some of them even made their own creations.
If you are the "giver" never make the "receiver" feel like you are doing them a favor. The Muffin and I have been on the receiving end so many times. We feel so blessed that others have thought about us. There is also some shame involved. It is hard to be a "taker."
If you do bless someone do so with a merry heart. Nobody likes to feel like an obligation.
I don’t
know about you, but there are weeks that I can’t seem to get it together. My
days and nights seem hopelessly unproductive.
This
past week was one of those weeks.
I slept poorly, my body ached and my brain was pea-soup
foggy.
The foggy brain is more of a frequent state of being. But
that’s another story.
I can’t completely call the whole week a wash. My family ate
every night (I didn’t even have to pull out the PB&J meal plan). My kitchen
stayed relatively clean and Josiah got his math for the week done.
Victory!
So what does a girl do when she feels her days, nights and
every minute in between are catching up with her?
It’s time to take a step back and work in some “me time”
into your life.
I realize that the idea of “me time” is completely against
everything we tell ourselves.
Our society is filled with women who spend more time
primping for their selfies than they do snuggling with their kids. We all shake our heads at the ladies who seem
to neglect their families with endless social events, appointments, parties and
manicures.
On the other side of the equation are the moms who devote
every second of their existence to children, friends and church. This is the
group I am more personally acquainted with.
We feel as if we are juggling a million perfect eggs and at
any minute one of those eggs (or 13) is going to fall…what a waste of eggs!
Here is a truth we need to accept. There has to be a balance
between the two extremes in “womandom.” And we need to show grace to ourselves
and others.
So here is the question I need to ask you (and myself).
When was the last time you did something for yourself?
I am not talking about brushing your teeth. Or reading that
book on effective parenting.
I recognize that there are seasons in your life that require
you to give every spare inch of yourself to those around you.
You might be caring for a newborn. Or an elderly parent who
is living with you.
There still has to be some balance.
The truth is that your inability to care for yourself could
lead to other bigger issues.
A decline in your physical health.
A decline in your emotional health.
A decline in your spiritual health.
Caring for yourself doesn’t mean you have to turn in your “I’m
Every Woman” card. It just means that you are learning to thrive.
So. My friends.
Here are a few things you can do to start looking after
yourself. Please keep in mind that my advice is just that. It's advice. I can't even begin to pretend I know everything there is to know. I am not privy to the inner workings of your heart or your life. This is what I have learned through my experience...be that what it may!
1.Choose one
way to pamper yourself. This could be enjoying a long soak in the tub, a
DIY pedicure, a trip the hair dressers or a massage. For us budget conscience
gals the tub soaking and the DIY pedicure can be cheap (obviously). You can
also bat your eyelashes at your husband to offer the massage (I’m sure he’ll be
willing). A trip to the hair salon can be pricey…however, consider going to a
beauty school. As a former member of that tribe, I recommend it….they even do
manicures!
2.Schedule
some Alone time! Doesn’t that sound
heavenly? This is where your spouse needs to show his support. Even though I
only have one child, I am (by nature) an introvert. I am energized when I can
spend some time by myself. Your alone time doesn’t have to be a retreat to a
spa in the woods…though doesn’t that sound delicious!...The Muffin took Josiah
to swim team practice last night. I spent 2 blissful hours by myself pinning
recipes on Pinterest. If you are a
single mom, think about exchanging “alone times” with another momma.
3.Address
any health concerns. This is where we fail. I understand completely. My
health issues have cost my family so much. I can’t even begin to express how I
feel about that. However, my husband would tell you that he would rather have
me than new cars and a new house. How long has it been since you’ve had a pap
smear? Are you of an age to get a mammogram? Are you eating right, exercising
and getting plenty of sleep. If you can’t answer those questions with
confidence you need to figure it out. I realize I am being fairly blunt, but
this is where I have been. Your family needs you as healthy as you can be.
4.Enlist
the troops to help care for the home and other responsibilities. This, of
course, only applies if you have “troops” to enlist. I saw an interesting meme
on Facebook the other day. It was a picture of a washing machine and a dryer.
The basic idea is this. If your child can operate a cell phone, he or she can
learn to do laundry. Boom! We are doing our kids a disservice if we are not
training them to be responsible in the home. Especially our boys. Especially
the littles. I figure if Josiah can operate an Xbox with certain prowess he can
certainly be responsible for daily chores. And, yes. He does laundry. In fact,
this week he did his own laundry. He even put it away in the correct drawers...which is more than I can say for how he puts away the dishes.
5.Have a
hobby. What? Some of you will tell me that you don’t have time for a hobby.
You have as many hours in the day as the rest of us. Having a hobby doesn’t
mean that you have to carve out a corner in the living room for basket weaving,
scrapbooking and macramé. It means that you take time in your life to do
something that is stimulating to your creative brain. Having a hobby helps you combat
stress and helps keep those brain cells active. Your hobby might be
recreational reading, knitting or baking. My hobbies change from time to time,
but I like creating things. I have always loved to read. I also love to go to
Thrift Stores and Flea Markets. That has also become time I can spend with The
Muffin and Josiah. The Muffin and I have had many date nights at The Thrift
Store.
6.Spruce up
the outside just a bit. I don’t want to appear shallow, but just like
fixing up the front of the house can “up” its curb appeal, so can putting some
attention into your physical appearance can make the whole package more charming.
This is my nice way of saying…take some time to look as nice as you can! This
has been a hard one for me. My big deal is that I have always felt “fluffy.” I
felt that it wouldn’t make any difference to dress up. People would still see
the fat. However, I’ve found that taking time to spruce up makes me feel so
much better. My momma was right!
7.Devote
Time Every Day to Prayer and Heartfelt Study. Even if it is 10 minutes you
need some time alone with God. For a time, I was combining Josiah’s devotion
time with mine. I wanted to be an example. I found, however, that I truly
missed those moments when I could scribble in my journal and have time alone
with the Father. Josiah’s Bible Reading and journaling is now scheduled into
our school time. I make sure I spend a few minutes every morning with my
journal, my Bible and a hot cup of tea. It centers me for my day in a way that
can’t be replicated any other way.
I think one of the big things I want to address here today
is that you are also training those around you (namely your children) how to
treat themselves and future spouses. I want my son to be a thoughtful partner
to his wife. I want him to learn to care for others and take pride in a job
well done.
I also want my family to love being with me. If I am tired, cranky
and miserable to be with...what am I teaching them? Am I shouting because I
feel overwhelmed? Do I smile enough or is my face hold a permanent worried
look? Does any little crisis or catastrophe throw me off my game or do I take
minor bumps in the road in stride?
And speaking from experience…it is a horrible feeling to be
helpless in your own home. To have to rely on someone to perform even those
most basic of needs can be quite humbling. But it also taught me a valuable
lesson. I have to handle myself with care.
My sweet friends. My prayer today is that we all learn to do
this. And that we recognize our worth.
Just a little note: This post had been up a good two hours before I read back through and noticed I had asked you to "clean" the banner below. My friends. I need all the help I can get. By all means...clean to your heart's content.
I didn't know if it was nice manners to refer to ladies undergarments in a public blog. My late grandma called panties skivvies. I figured if it was okay for Grandma...
Anyhoo.
You've heard the expression..."I need to put on my big girl (insert preferred term for ladies undergarments)". It is used to encourage ourselves or others to do any number of the following:
1. Grow up and act like an adult.
2. Take the bull by the horns (so to speak) and attempt something you are dreading.
3. Move on from a trying situation and make the best of it.
4. Grow up and act like an adult.
"Adulting" (a term I have heard more and more of) is hard work. With it comes responsibility and maturity. We have to do things that are hard, painful and mostly unrewarding.
Often it involves us biting our tongues, taking the high road, pushing ourselves and taking chances.
Putting on those Big Girl Skivvies and pushing ahead can be challenging. But (and this is a big one) it is something you HAVE to do if you want to live a beautiful and meaningful life.
So here is something I want you to do right now. Write down one thing that is troubling you. Or challenging you. Or making things difficult for you and your loved ones.
Think hard about this one. Is it something that is a surface issue or just a symptom of a larger problem?
Now look at what you have written down and put it in PERSPECTIVE.
You might be experiencing an agonizing, heart wrenching season in your life. Sometimes it is hard to put that in perspective when you are the middle of it. A mature person recognizes that those periods in our lives are to honored and mourned. But that there has to be some sort of moving on process. You might be still in the grieving stage. That still does not mean that you cannot rejoice and give thanks for those blessings you still see around you.
What about relationship issues? I have been married for 24 years. I ADORE my husband. However, we are not perfect people. There have been private and painful periods of our marriage that I don't share. They aren't to be dwelled upon. If I could name a thousand faults in The Muffin's life, he could name a thousand in mine. My perspective is that I have a healthy husband to stand by my side. We have WORKED hard on our relationship and I recognize my place in it. My desire is to encourage, to be his cheerleader. I also have to recognize my own responsibility to make it work. I am not to fix him. And who I am to suggest he needs fixing?
I also want to make sure that I don't make generalizations about every relationship. I only know what has worked for us.
Maybe you are struggling financially. I hear ya'! Here is a little perspective. The Muffin and I have come to this peaceful answer in our finances. God is in control. Most of our problems are 1st World Country problems. The screw and nail in my tire. I need a whole new set of tires and frankly, a new car. Here is the perspective. I have wheels. They aren't reliable wheels, but they are wheels. If I have to change my plans, not drive as often...then that is the way it must be. My minuscule grocery budget allows me to be creative and resourceful. It is more than most people have across the world. We have lost houses, health and eeked out an existence in our materialistic world. What we have learned is that while it is nice to have...it's not necessary for happiness. God is our provider. He has always given us what we needed.
I have to remind myself daily of where I have been and what God has seen me through. Having a healthy perspective makes the difference.
What about ATTITUDE?
I hesitate to even bring this one up, but it's a must. We can't go through life pitching a fit every time something doesn't go our way. We can't say what we want or act out with no concern for those around us.
Basically. We have to grow up.
I am going to leave it there.
Putting on those Big Girl Skivvies also requires the ability to GROW.
Sometimes growing up is painful. When I was a little girl I would have awful growing pains. My legs would ache at night. I would toss and turn and curse my Dad's tall genes. It must have worked. I only got to 5"4.
Growing up also requires correction. I don't know anybody who loves to be corrected. A few days ago, I overheard a conversation between a nurse and a teacher. I wasn't intentionally eaves dropping, but I was sitting next to them so it was kind of hard to miss. Both of them are responsible for education of young people (the nurse works with student nurses). They were lamenting the fact that their students are unable to take critiques with any kind of grace or introspection.
Can I tell you that our society has a problem with this? We HAVE to be right. We don't like anyone pointing out weaknesses (who are you to tell me...). While I believe that you need to let people be themselves, we also have to respect authority and those who are given charge over us.
If we can't learn...we can't grow.
I have had to receive correction concerning my health. I am capable of living in my own little dream world. There is something about my psyche that can escape to a "happy place" and just deal with it.
Sometimes we need tough love. My tough love reminded me that I needed to be healthy for my son. I couldn't let the challenges before me dictate what I do for myself.
What kind of tough love are we ignoring for the sake of pride?
So take another look at what you have written down.
Let's talk about the "move on" part about the title of my post. Are you stuck? Maybe you feel like you are taking steps in the right direction, but you constantly find yourself in reverse.
Here is where I get to pull my favorite numbering trick. You might find something in my advice that helps you move on.
1. Have patience. Have you heard the expression that Rome wasn't built in a day? Well, neither can a person find that place of maturity and self-acceptance overnight. You are going to have ups and downs. Ins and outs. Good days and bad days. Just do what you know how to do (do the best you can).
2. Develop good habits. I have set a goal for myself in the area of productivity. I want my mornings to be more productive. I hate feeling like I never get anything done. It makes me feel ineffective. I found it helpful to do a little bit of reading about how other ladies get things done. However, here is a word of caution. Don't try and overhaul your life at one time. Take babysteps. Good habits happen over a period of time. They can't be called into existence.
3. Just do something. Discontentment is a big joy sucker. We can wallow in self-pity (I'm the queen) for quite some time. If we are not careful it becomes part of who we are. The best defense against this is to JUST DO SOMETHING! Not satisfied with your house? Make it more homey by displaying things that you love and mean something to you and your family. It's the people in the home that matter. Feel like you want to do something different with your life? Consider taking a class. If that is not an option, immerse yourself in learning a new hobby. When Josiah was much younger, I decided I needed to have an outlet outside the church (my husband is a pastor). It was one of the best decisions I ever made. I joined a "writing" club. I started volunteering with a children's theatre.
4. Practice the art of forgiveness. Ouchie. This can be tough. However, it is vital that we forgive those hurtful words and deeds that have come against us. Sometimes people are just thoughtless. Sometimes they are incapable of mature thought (they haven't learned to pull up their Big Girl Skivvies). We can't dwell in those dark spots. Unforgiveness can hold on to a person with black, vicious claws. It dictates our every move and every thought. It keeps us stuck. Maturity (and The Bible) tells us to pray for those who persecute us.
5. Be Kind. Here is my last little thought (and you all said.."well, thank goodness for that!). It is discouraging to get online and see all of us fussing at each other. This one gets made at that one. This one is offended by that one. Then we have those who always seem to be complaining. We don't respect one another's feelings, convictions and actions. We need to start behaving like the people momma raised us to be (or needed to raise us to be).
I've had quite the week. I won't get into all the juicy details here (think snot).
I had to go there.
I originally had some notes scribbled down for a different "beautiful" topic this week.
But. Things changed in my heart a little bit and I thought I would talk a little bit about the healing power of music.
I'm sure that all of you understand how it works. You have your favorite songs and singers. Maybe you enjoy a particular genre of music or are a musician yourself.
There has always been music in my life.
Both sides of my family are musical. My parents encouraged music in our lives in one form or another. I took piano lessons, played the saxophone...but the love of my life was choir and vocal music.
You don't have to even carry a tune to love music. Music speaks to our soul. It can sooth or agitate. It can convey a message or a feeling that can't be expressed in every day words.
Some of my favorite music speaks of my Savior's love for me and touches a place in spirit.
Some music touches me as musician. I can appreciate the intricacies and musicianship involved.
Some is just plain fun. And we all need a lot of fun.
If you could compose the playlist of your life what would be on it?
This week I want you to think about the music of your life. What are some of your favorite songs and what do they say about you? Do you find solace in music? What kind of music energizes you?
For my part I want to share with you 11 of my favorites.
I like all kinds of music. When I was little my parents bought a box of "albums" (those were round vinyl objects) from a flea market. Inside was swing, opera, a record of Disney favorites, Christmas music, classical, a little bluegrass....It was like ....magic. And Skittles. And Daffodils.
The Song That Causes My Eyebrows To Rise Ever So Dramatically
My first song is Luciano Pavarotti singing Nessun Dorma. You have to watch this. The expression on his face after his final glorious note is spectacular. It's like he's saying "I can't believe I just hit that note...I'm completely awesome!" Yes. Pavarotti is Mr. Awesome.
And what is a "Nessun Dorma?" It is an aria from Puccini's opera Turandot. I believe it's in Italian.
The Song That Needs To Be Played Every Time I Walk Into A Room (just sayin')
My next choice is Boléro. Bolero is a one-movement orchestral piece by Maurice Ravel. This, too, was on a record of Best Loved Classical Music. I adore Bolero. When I was little I would pretend I was part of a long procession of fairy creatures. I was the princess who made a dramatic entrance towards the end when the music starts to swell.
Of course, I am partial to the saxophone section in this piece...You got to love the orchestra conductors. The conductor for this particular performance is Valery Gergiev. He is also the artistic director of the Marinksy Theatre in St. Petersburg, Russia. The Marinsky is home to the Kirov Ballet. This my friends is the kind of stuff you know when you watch documentaries for fun.
You have to watch this one with the kids. Especially if you are a homeschooler. This is a wonderful introduction to the orchestra.
The Song Most Likely To Make Me Cry
We are going to take a break from my classical choices (for the time being); My next song is one of my favorite songs in the whole history of songs. He Leadeth Me is MY jam. It tells my story. This one is frequently is our song rotation at church. I always sing lead for this one.
The clip below is not of me. The Martins are a group I have seen several times. They have that close family harmony that I enjoy while singing with my own family.
The Song That Tells Me It's Going To Be Okay
This song has been a source of comfort for me as well. It is an old-fashioned Southern Gospel song written in 1911. My favorite version is done by the incomparable trio of Dolly Parton, Linda Rondstat and EmmyLou Harris. This might not be your kind of music, but you would have to almost tone deaf not to appreciate the harmonies. I got to sing a few of the "Trios" songs in High School. I always sang EmmyLou's part....even though I felt like a Linda.
The Song That Makes Me Burst Into The Alto Part (unsolicited)
You have to know this next one. If you spent any time at all in a large choir you probably sang it.
Yep. It's The Hallelujah Chorus. I chose this clip so you wouldn't have to listen to Handel's complete Messiah. I can still remember my part. I think they switch the arrangement up a little. I saw some Sopranos singing on the alto part at one point. Altos never get the love they deserve.
Alto power!
Did I mention I'm an alto?
I ADORE Celtic Woman. In my spare time I dress up in a fancy ball gown and sing beautiful arias to castles full of people.
I only wish.
The Song That Makes Me Want A Ball Gown. And a Tiara.
This song, Non C'e Piu, is gawwgeous. I believe it was composed by Antonin Dvorak. When I am contemplative and need to hear something beautiful I listen this. And yes...this is one is on my real life playlist. I often use it as a cool down for my workouts.
I know what your thinking. Girlfriend! Do you like anything from the past few decades.
Well, yes. I do.
The Song That Makes Me Want To Sing!
One of my favorite groups to listen to is Pentatonix. Oh. My. Goodness.
They are an A Capella group. As anyone knows who has sung A Capella...it can be a tough genre. The tendency is for folks to lose the key just a bit.
I like several of their covers, but I just saw the video for one of their new original songs online. I don't know that it showcases their abilities as well, but...it made me happy.
The Song That Convicts Me!
I am a big fan of the group For King and Country. Their song, "Proof of Your Love," is so powerful.
The first time I heard it we were driving through the countryside. It spoke volumes to me. The music video is pretty awesome.
The Song That Makes Me Feel Slinky...And Makes Me Think of Rockin' My Baby
I know what your thinking.
What does that mean?
See I was right. This song is just pure wonderfulness. It's smooth. It's slinky. It's got soul. This version is from Louis Armstrong and Ella Fitzgerald. Pure, Pure Awesomeness.
I used to sing it as a lullaby to Josiah. When I hear it today I have to fight the urge to grab my teenage son and plunk him in my lap.
Enjoy. ....Oh. By the way. If you really want to listen to something special look up Dinah Washington on Youtube. Just click on one of the playlists you see there. That lady could saaang.
The Song Most Likely To Cause Me To Burst Into Spontaneous Dance When Played Over the Speakers At The Store
So I wrestled with myself over this one. Do you really want to know that a pastor's wife enjoys a little funk? This song was even my ring tone for a long time. I decided to change it after it went off during a Wednesday night Bible Study. The Vice President of a local Bible college was speaking. Just sayin'... However, this is the song I play when I need to put a little pep in my day.
The Song That Just Has To Be Played
My last choice had to be this one.
I admit it. I'm not ashamed. I am a musical loving Freak! The Phantom of the Opera is not a new story. It actually was a French novel first. There have been many adaptations, but my favorite is Andrew Lloyd Webber's musicale. The above version is from the 2004 film (of which I own). The Phantom played by Gerard Butler isn't the most gloriously voiced...but it's Gerard Butler!
I generally like happy ending, fluffy kind of musicals. This one is not fluffy in the least. But the music is just plain catchy. I had to force myself not to include an addendum. The Phantom of the Opera (song) is a close second to The Music of the Night.
Aren't you glad I abstained? This has been one long post.
So my friends. I had fun sharing my music. What are some of your favorites?
Click on the banner to read more about Learning to Live A Beautiful Life (if you are so inclined).
Before I give you the assignment for this week (should you chose to except it) is a picture of my newest addition.
Last week I showed you a pitiful picture of me soaking my feet in an old salad bowl.
My momma also saw it and sent me home with one of their many foot baths.
Yay!
I have arrived.
This week I want to talk about how to make your every day meals just a bit fancier. I challenge you not to keep your special china moldering in the cabinet.
Get out those fancy dessert glasses or china plates! Don't wait for special occasions to live on the swanky side.
This week I would like for you to choose one meal...be it a full meal or snack, dessert, whatever...to fancify.
I am going to give you a few of my favorite frugal fancy food hacks. Fer Sure.
Here my friends we have the versatile crepe. If you can flip a pancake you make a crepe. Don't let the fancy word scare you away.
Crepes take minimal ingredients and can be filled with sweet or savory fillings. They make for wonderful "impress the guests for breakfasts" kind of dishes.
My crepes here are simply filled with chopped fried apples and drizzled with a homemade caramel sauce (The Pioneer Woman has a really easy recipe). I also sprinkled them with fragrant cinnamon. They are plated on a vintage china plate that I got at the Thrift Store for a whole .25.
My favorite crepe recipe is from Allrecipes. Be sure to read the comments for some extra inspiration.
For lunch nothing says comfort more than a simple bowl of soup. You can dress up a bowl of soup considerably with just a little garnish. On this day I made my favorite recipe of tomato soup. I made extra large croutons out of some stale bread and garnished the whole thing with a little bit of parsley and just a tad bit of mozzarella cheese.
Of course I used one my favorite bowls evah! I should tell you that it is one of my more recent acquisitions. While at my mom's house this past weekend I happened to ooh and ahh in just the right tone over this bowl and its mate. They are now mine. Apparently, Mom is partial to the oohs and ahhs of her eldest. I shall try the same on a few other choices pieces of china.
I have mentioned before that I generally make supper easy on myself the majority of the week. However, I do chose one night a week that I pour all of my love and heavy whipping cream into a special supper for my guys.
Our special supper happened on an ordinary Tuesday evening this week. There was not a swim team practice nor spin class to draw us from home.
I made one of my favorite dishes ever. My Mom's famous French Chicken. This was the dish I asked for on my birthdays when I was a young 'n. I paired it with some simple mashed potatoes and Julia Child's Haricots Verts a la Maitre d'Hotel...which are basically green beans sauteed with a little lemon juice and butta. I picked up one of her French Cooking cookbooks this summer at The Thrift Store. Ooh la la.
This is a deceptively cheap meal. The green beans came straight from my Daddy's garden. The potatoes were 10 pounds for 1.49 this week at Aldi's and the chicken thighs were marked down for under .99 a pound. I only used half of the package I purchase. I love it when I can make a meal for soo cheap!
It is a really pretty meal and absolutely comforting. I did garnish the potatoes with a tassel of parsley. I should of chopped and sprinkled. As it is the potatoes look like a knitted hat with a pom pom on top.
We don't have dessert every evening. I will bake a nice loaf of fruit bread or a bundt cake once a week. Or I make up a batch of One Quart Pudding. This is an easy peasy microwave dessert.
Once again the caramel sauce makes an appearance. The star of the show is my adorable bubble glass dessert cup. I found 2 of these at a Thrift Store recently. I paid a buck for the pair.
These dessert glasses would make eating Jello a classy experience. The only thing missing from this picture is a dollop of real whipped cream.
Sometimes simple is just best. In this case simple comes in the form of a cup of Hot Chocolate. Of course, I have a truly decadent recipe that I use on occasion. And then there are the few boxes of Hot Chocolate mix I have in my cabinet. They are cheap and easy to use in case of a chocolate craving.
This simple cup of hot chocolate is made special by the huge amount of mini marshmallows I piled on the top. I then drizzled a bit of the ever versatile caramel sauce over the marshmallows and added a sprinkling of cinnamon. This mug is extra large and presents any chocolate lover with a drizzly, yummy treat. I looked for a bag of mini M&M's I had in the back of my freezer (for those special baking needs). It looks like someone got to them before I did. You can use any kind of chopped candy to send the whole thing really over the top.
Every girl needs a few things for an impromptu tea party.
This tea bag holder and spoon make for a charming little addition. Both were given to me by my momma. I am sure she got them at a flea market years ago. I have an assortment of a both holders and spoons.
My bundt cake is Gluten and Sugar Free, but you can use even the easiest recipe to charm your tea party participants.
My tea party supplies have come from a variety of places, but all I have purchased myself have come from either a flea market or Thrift Store. I buy a cup here and there. Nothing matches and that's the way I like it. (Uh-Huh!)
Have I inspired you to fancify your feast?
Here are a few things to keep in mind.
1. Every recipe I use has a healthy alternative. For example, The Pioneer Woman Caramel Sauce is to die for. But I could do just that if I eat too much of it. I like to keep my blood sugar fairly controlled (I have that pesky diabetes type 2). For myself I use this recipe. My hot chocolate is always sugar free and dolloped with whipped cream and cinnamon. Just don't be afraid to make it fancy.
2. Worried about using the fancy china? Frankly, my friend. Watcha waiting for? You can dial down the worry meter by taking a few precautions. Eat at the table. Don't use vintage china that has any gold or silver around the edge in the microwave. Chances are its the real stuff. My sets have been lovingly pieced together by my parents from a variety of flea markets through the years. My china pieces are really collectors items, but I have several that I just picked up at The Thrift Store.
3. Use cloth napkins. Oh yes. We used cloth napkins at my niece's graduation tea. You can check out that post for more fancy food ideas.
4. More than anything...make memories, have fun and make it special!
Make sure to check out my other Learning to Live a Beautiful Life posts thus far.
